Tuesday, May 19, 2009

I do, I mean I did

While at a work conference today, I was lamenting over what I was going to buy Craig for our anniversary. I was quite annoyed since he broke THE RULE and bought me something when we agreed that we wouldn’t buy each other gifts this year. While I should thoroughly enjoy the massage he surprised me with, it almost was not worth the stress of having to figure out how to purchase a gift in return in only a few short hours. My irritation may have been slightly elevated by the feeling that his blatant disregard of our agreement might have been over the guilt he housed from taking Mothers Day to a whole new level of suck this year.

During the gift purchasing conversation, the lady sitting next to me asked how many years we were celebrating. Then she exclaimed, “Oh my! You certainly don’t look old enough to have been married for eight years.” I resisted the urge to hug and kiss this unsuspecting stranger only because it might have been distracting to the other conference attendees.

As I think back to our wedding day, what resonates is that I had an absolute blast at our wedding. Let’s be real here, if there is anything you can take away from your big day, how cool is it that I can say that and mean it? I don’t recall much about the food, the decorations, and all of the minute details. I remember the family, the friends, and the celebration. In fact, we showed the Country Club a level of fun that it certainly had ever seen before. Also, as I look back at our wedding picture, I can’t help but think that I most likely couldn’t fit my left leg in that dress today. If I starved it for a week it might get above the knee. Maybe Kate could play dress-up with it? When on earth was I really a size 0?



In preparation for the wedding, I was terrified about the prospect of erupting into uncontrollable sobs. At that time in my life, I possessed an awkward super-sensitivity to weddings. I cried at every wedding I attended. I cried watching The Wedding Story on TLC. It is quite possible that I may have erupted into tears at the mere utterance of the word wedding. I’m not a hyperemotional person; it’s a phenomenon that was inexplicable. I was petrified that I would start crying at the alter and that I WOULD NOT BE ABLE TO STOP. What would they do? I’d feel the pressure of people looking at me and I’d cry more. Then I would try to recite my vows and they would be coming out in sobbing stutters, which is obviously the picture of glamour that every bride wants to paint. I think at one point I entertained learning sign, just as an assurance that I would survive when plagued with a case of the Ridiculous Wedding Cries.

As we proceeded with our vows, I noticed something absolutely shocking. My dear husband-to-be was starting to tear up. For a brief moment, I panicked, waiting for my own flood gates to open. Instead, I laughed. It was one of those highly inappropriate times to laugh, but it just happened. I was so astounded and blindsided by his tears that I couldn’t help but laugh. I giggled through the majority of the vows, which I think was just an outlet for the relief I felt knowing that my own tears were no where to be found. In retrospect, I’m quite surprised that Craig didn’t change his mind at that very moment.

8 comments:

Ann's Rants said...

Okay Lynday, this is really getting ridiculous. Your blogging about potties, I'm blogging about potties. Your blogging about your anniversary, I'm blogging about my anniversary.

Oh. Gorgeous photo, btw. More, more!

Rachel Cotterill said...

When my husband proposed, I (being an incurable romantic, obviously) said yes-but-only-if-we-can-do-it-without-getting-stressed. It worked, we had a great time and didn't waste time worrying about the little things.

I'm glad you have such great memories, and happy anniversary. Did he like his present?

The Rambler said...

Congrats lady on the anniversary.

:sigh:

on fitting left leg in dress.

Waving hand vigorously here in agreeance.

ARGH.

Call Me Cate said...

Beautiful photo and memories of your day. Mine had a couple of nice moments but overall it wasn't great. Still, I'm happy with the end result and that's what matters.

So what did you get him? Huh? I think you should spill (after, of course, you tell him). My anniversary is a few months off but it's never too early for me to start panicking about gifts.

Divine Chaos said...

that is a gorgeous picture =)

I giggled through my vows too. I walked straight into a plate glass window on the way into the building though, so it could have been that I was suffering from a mild concussion ... then again, shortly after the wedding, I started introducing my spouse as "my first husband," so it may have been that deep down I knew there was no chance it was ever going to last .. lol

Crazy Mo said...

Gorgeous wedding photo. Lovely dress! The Husband and I have solved the gift-giving issue. When we first started dating, we agreed to never exchange gifts. Not for birthdays, Christmas, anniversaries ... nada. It's actually quite a relief. There's no pressure. And neither of us has ever broken that promise. Instead, he'll just randomly come home with, say, a giant back of peanut M&Ms. I love this man!

Jenners said...

Hey-- my wedding anniversary is May 19th too!! Woo hoo! We celebrated our 7th (and I didn't look as lovely as you on our wedding day -- lovely dress). We also made a "no gifts" promise and both of us kept it BUT my husband (who usually does break the vow) was DISAPPOINTED that I didn't secretly break the vow and get him something even though we said we weren't because he usually breaks it and thought I would for once. (I hope that made sense). Of course, then I felt terribly guilty ... and I'm not sure why! Men!!!!

Jeanne said...

Old Dog loves to point out the "deer in the headlights" look on my face in our wedding pictures, but I figure, with my history, I had a right to be terrified.