Thursday, November 20, 2008

Bring It

This week has been an insanely horrible week in our house due to reasons I’m not up to explaining to the internet. I’ll just say it ranks up there with a few of the worst I’ve had. Ever. I tell you this for a couple of reasons. First, I’ve not spent much time with Kate this week. Second, I’ve felt immensely guilty for how little quality time I’ve spent with her. Mommy guilt is not good. Third (and perhaps most significant) is that my patience is pretty much non-existent and my emotional state is more volatile that the status of America’s current financial market. I’ve been one the verge of losing my shit pretty much all week.

Tonight when we got home, Kate really wanted to make banana muffins. I mean, really wanted to make banana muffins. I was torn between making muffins, standing outside in the snow in my bare feet for hours, or listening to nails on a chalkboard. Given the mommy guilt factor, I decided I should embrace the muffins.

Muffin making went pretty much like this:

Dump dry ingredients together. Kate sticks finger into dry ingredients. Tell Kate no. Kate sticks finger right in the baking power, sticking a big finger full in her mouth.

Kate looks at me in horror and spits it out INTO THE BATTER.

Undeterred, we press on. Kate gets to the fifth banana and decides that one is for her. I mash the other bananas while she eats the remainder of the ingredients. Kate loses interest in the banana, smashing it under her leg and letting it collect various random particles from the surrounding areas.

I turn my back to check the oven and return to finish mixing the batter. Can’t find the fork. Where is the damn fork? Kate points to the bottom of the batter. I mean, why wouldn’t you bury the fork in the bottom of the bowl? Mom looks like she needs tested, right? While retrieving the vanishing fork, Kate picks up the mangled, half-eaten, infested banana mentioned earlier and throws it into the bowl.

Some good quality bonding time we were having, I tell you.

I inform Kate that we aren’t cooking these putrid muffins. She rebukes with shrieks that knock the earth just slightly out of orbit, so I oblige *shudder*.

I think this is the Universe’s way of flipping me off.


C. Beth said...

Oh, Lyndsay, even though you make it somewhat funny, I know how awful those experiences are, when your patience is GONE and the toddler insists on still acting like a toddler. I'm so sorry. :(

Lia Pearson said...

ahhhh...that post made me want to stand barefoot in the snow and scream right along side you because Lorelai was a terror today also. If it makes you feel any better (and I know it doesn't lol) Kate is freaking the cutest thing I've ever seen!

Jenners said...

The photos are just priceless! She looks so proud and happy ... so you shouldn't feel guilty. She's obviously not suffering. Hope your world gets better!

Kelly said...

There should be NO GUILT in your world, because, I promise you, there is no way in hell I have ever even attempted such a thing with any of my children. You get a gazillion bonus points for even trying! Hope things get better soon.

Tia said...

I have so been there and you handled just like a great mother does. Kudos to you!

Comedy Goddess said...

This is like a page out of my life! I now know that it is not really about the muffins. It has more to do with who gets to decide what we do today. You win some and maybe lose some, but at least you have fun. And pictures for blackmail, hee hee.

Becky said...

So sorry to hear about your terrible, no good, very bad week. I hope there are better times to come, soon.

Susanne and Corey said...

Well, going by those great pics, it looks like you did keep "your shit together" and that's the most important thing.

Our kids love us, even when we're not at our best. So why do we try so hard to always be at our best, then feel guilty when we have a bad day?

Yours is obviously thrilled to be playing in the batter, and probably even more happy to be spending time with you. So, no guilt necessary!

Anonymous said...

probably will be the best darn muffins you ever had!!!

Makita Jazzqueen said...

I'm sorry you feel bad, but look at your toddler and feel better, I know she'll make you feel allright, little children have that effect on people often.

The Rambler said...

I hear ya! I guess these mommy moments are what makes us the best mom's in the world. (At least to our own kids)

I pray your daughter and mine don't scream at the same time or the planet might blow to smithereens from the extreme ridiculousness of sound.

Hope your day gets better. Thanks for the smile and reminding me it's not just me...:)

juliee said...

ohhhh my, she is so darn cute.

Debbie said...

oooh.... she's so darn cute!! It's been a while since I've had a toddler in the house, so I don't want to be one of those weird old ladies (in the firt place, i'm not OLD, only 49) who say..."enjoy it while you can", because when you're going thru it, it's a whole other story.
On the other hand.... she's too cute and your story is too funny. It made me laugh with remembering.
Hope the next week is better for you.

Braja said...

That was hilarious.
Your Kate is GORGEOUS.
I'm not touching those muffins.