Last night, Kate was being rambunctious on the couch with Craig and me. She kept hiding behind the big cushions and jumping out and scaring us. She was doing some jumping maneuver and went over me, heading toward the ground. I grabbed her arm, trying to catch her. That didn't work, but it did make her contort into an abnormal position as she landed on the ground. It was the perfect makings for Mother of the Year: How she dislocated my elbow. On top of the unnatural position of her body, when she hit the hardwood floor, she hit hard.
Craig and I looked at each other, waiting for the scream that would certainly wake the neighbors. She looked up at me, took a deep breath, and said, "I'm sorry floor."